I don't wanna lose her..

U r one of my best friends..
I can't lose u just like this..
how can i...
i don't wan the history to repeat again..
but i can't stop myself..
i just don't feel like talking to u....
whenever i see u, i feel a sense of fakeness..
to me,
I'M NOT IMPORTANT TO YOU anymore..

We've known each other last year..
around June..
our interests match..
Three of us..
Eunice, u and me were always together..
we talked abt nearly everything..
but then things changed this year..
Eunice went to Aussie..
u went to a better class..
and that's where my nightmares begin.
___________________________________

U kept giving me disappointments..
I tried my best to accept that this is U..
but i can't.

Sometimes..
i'll wait for you by the stairs..
i know i'll surely look very stupid..
and when i saw you...
We said HI..
i walked beside u...
but u acted as i'm invisible..
u keep joking and chatting non stop with yr frens from yr class..
who do u think i'm?
u never wait even if i'm behind u..
u always left me..
turning me even moody..

or..
whenever i find u to chat with u..
u always left me when yr frens frm yr class call u..
do u have to do this to me..?
as if u r someone ON CALL or something...
but u r not..
and u never realise how much it affects my feelings..

Maybe i'm just..
not important to you anymore..
since u once said that frens not from your class ain't so close to u and could not be yr frens anymore..
whatever...
I'm sick of that...

I realised that you r someone who doesn't understand pp's feelings..
u did not tell me about the case that made u cry...
u said u wanted to..
but..
u lied to me instead..
little do u know..
i've known almost part of it..
and i understand that u r secretive..
but all the things u did..
i can't believe that it's u anymore...
do u treat me as your friend?
or.. someone who irritates you?????

First love isn't something to be played of..
Once u lost it..
u lost it forever..
do u know that???
and do u know how bad is that to hurt the feelings of pp in love??
maybe to separate a pair of couples..
maybe to cheat someone you love..
or even to yr FRENS...

I regret what i've done to my ownself..
and when u know how deep u hurt yrself and that person..
u regret..
but it's too late...
i took months to forget the pain..
and u?
i don't think u will feel anything even if the rumours are true..
I can't belive that it's u...
Did u changed or what??
R u that brave enough to kiss and hold yr own best friend's bf..
haix...
but u just don't know that the rumours spread everywhere....

but then u told me that u already changed yr target..
and it's someone younger than u..
and both of u never see each other before..
and after a few days chatting on msn..
he fell for u and u fell for him?
FUNNY..

that's not love k?
that's just an illusion...
but i don't think u actually believe what i said...
and even gave me advice on not accepting THAT MOUSE.
swt..
i know what to do la k..

* please refer to BUSY DAY and scroll down..