Hi

4.05 a.m. in the morning.
And I'm struggling with my AutoCAD.
I used to hate learning computer so much,
so much that I purposely failed my Computer subject during Form 1.
I received only 14 marks for an easy paper.
I was happy that I failed..
But now, I regret.
Seriously.

Things doesn't get any better for me.
Everything in college is okay, despite losing two of my favourite buddies.
One was Zeon, as expected. And the other, surprisingly and for no reason.
Raymond?! Yes. Raymond. The one whom I treated like my own brother.
He left, but not only that, he hates me now.
For no reason.
Wtf.

Oh yeah.
And thirdly.
My so called "sweetheart"?
Fuck that guy. Such a problem maker.
I'm totally speechless and like always tell Joe,
"I'm not gonna put any efforts in this shit!"

Lastly?
Some feelings that I couldn't let go of.
Which leaves me 无奈 to the max.
Nobody would UNDERSTAND.
And I could tell NOBODY, either. But myself.
Probably in my next life, it doesn'y have to be like this.

Hate the way Loy always jumped in as the third party,
thinking as if he fucking knowwwwwws everything.
Hate the way he scolded me like he's god.
Yeah, I know you freaking care about your friend.
Or your crush. Whatever.
"CBTM = Come back to me"
You said that you're trying to help her by whatsapp-ing me and telling me what it means?
Come on, Loy. Mingli is stupid.
But she figured out something SIMILAR to this, just that she didn't TELL YOU.
She couldn't figure out short forms like the way you, SMART ASS, did.
She'd rather be honest than to cheat the way out.

Other than staying in the room, having "fun" with assignments.
I guess I wouldn't know what else more to do.
It's been a while since I catch up with my high school friends.
All except Jye Lan, which, I've been meeting up quite often, lately.

I ate only a little these days.
One proper meal per day.
The rest of the time I'd probably drink Attain or Fiberwise from Melaleuca.
Not that I have no appetite, but I know that I'm really going
to get fat if I only eat, sleep and only focus on my assignments.

I rarely step foot on Burmatel nowadays.
Yik Ting goes there almost every night and...
I couldn't help her much on her assignments when I'm already so slow.
Though she seems to be the only friend that I could talk to about almost everything.
The only person that saw me cry during Valentine's Day,
and the only person who stayed by my side at Sunrise McDonalds the entire night.
I bet not even Yuki and Bee Chin know about this until I told them.
I cried, NOT because I don't have a valentine to celebrate with.
I cried for some fuck shit reason.

Doesn't matter that Zeon isn't gonna help me on homework anymore.
It really DOESN'T MATTER, SINCE HE THINKS THAT I'M BASICALLY USING HIM.
WTF, man. Who on earth wants to use you?!
At least I could be much more independent right now.
And what's more? Nickson is being really helpful.
He's been pushing me a lot, on my assignments.
Thank god.

3.48am

Time's ticking, and each time at a faster pace.
But deep inside, I know I have to stay in control.
Now it's not the time to fool around anyway.


And though I woke up this morning feeling as if it was a dream.
I'd really miss and would watch

... as you go.